It's so much more than that.
Delta Alpha Pi (DAP) is an International Honor Society for students with disabilities. DAP was established to distinguish students who have attained superior academic records while managing personal setbacks. The mission of DAP is to recognize strength, achievement and pride in these students.
On April 27th I was inducted into the Delta Alpha Pi International Honor Society - Gamma Alpha Chapter.
Surprise!!! That's right, I have a disability. It's not the kind of disability that's physical or easily seen. I suffer from learning disabilities.
It's not something I talk about or bring up often. Disabilities are automatically seen as a negative thing by so many. It's a stereotype that's been around for decades. I'm not ashamed of my disabilities but I've never wanted anyone to look at me differently or not allow me the same opportunities as others because I don't fit what's known as normal.
I faced adversity from the moment I questioned having a disability.
I'd always been a good student and good grades were normal for me. I remember being in high school and taking an AP (Advanced Placement) course and struggling. It was a subject I was known for being strong in, so why wasn't I understanding things? I remember going to my Mom and asking to make an appointment with my doctor because I felt something wasn't right. I've always known my body and mind well enough that I sensed something wasn't working correctly in my brain. We made the appointment and when we sat down with the doctor we were basically told I was just trying to cheat the system and get some medication. We pushed and pushed and the doctor finally said the best way to evaluate me was to have my teachers fill out a questionnaire about how I was in the classroom. Because I was never a problem child and didn't act out in class, none of my teachers could see how something could be wrong with me. I managed to push through my last year of high school but it was never easy.
When I got to college, things only became more difficult. Everything about college classes were different from what I'd known before. From the style of your classes to your tests and assignments. I was putting in my whole 110%. I wasn't that kid who went and partied from Thursday to Sunday. You could always find me in my dorm studying and taking notes. There wasn't time to have a life. My time had to be devoted to school and even then I wasn't seeing the grades and results I expected. How could I be spending countless hours putting in all this effort and still not get it? Half way through my sophomore year I'd had enough. I was tired of not getting anywhere. I told my parents I was taking a semester off and getting tested. Someway, somehow I was going to get an answer.
After extensive searching I finally found a doctor who was really willing to see what was going on. I remember having to go into her office and take different types of tests and answer so many questions for an entire day. It was tiresome and uncomfortable but I knew that if I wanted answers (which I did) I had to do it. About a week or two later we were called to come back and see what they'd found. Sure enough, they uncovered that I had ADHD and a few different learning disabilities. They weren't surprised that I was struggling in my classes based off of what they'd found. Going forward I would be able to present their report to my school and receive accommodations so that I could really give my best effort in class.
I can't begin to explain what a difference those accommodations made. People would think that my accommodations meant that things were easier for me. For example, "That test is going to be easier for her because she is given more time to take it." I'll be the first to tell you that way of thinking is wrong. Yes, I was given accommodations. It was proven that I needed them. But that didn't mean the rest of college was going to be a breeze for me. I still had to put more effort into my studies than most people would. Because of my disabilities, I have to work harder and longer than most people. The discomfort I had every time I had to walk into a classroom, take a test, or try and concentrate on what a professor was lecturing about...You can't understand how hard such simple tasks are for me to do.
Every semester I would meet with my teachers the first week of class to explain that I had a disability and would be needing accommodations. The first semester or two I had to do this I remember feeling so embarrassed because of the stereotypes associated with disabilities. After that I let go of the embarrassment. I accepted that by sharing the fact that I needed accommodations, I was really asking for help and that there was nothing wrong with that. Most schools have a department for students with disabilities. The school that I attended did and they were extremely helpful in making sure that my professors received the appropriate information to verify what accommodations I was to be given. I worked my butt off every semester and I was back to seeing the grades I was used to. I finally understood what was different about me and how to cope and manage as best as I could.
When I received the letter in the mail announcing I was chosen to join this honor society, I was touched. I didn't realize the society even existed but the fact that they recognized the hard work and superior grades I'd earned was a bigger deal to me than most people would probably expect. Because of how hard I would have to work to achieve the same thing as others, it meant a lot that someone was noticing and saw that I accomplished something that isn't easy for people with disabilities.
There are requirements that have to be met in order to be eligible to join this honor society. As an undergraduate student I had to:
- Present a documented disability and work with one of the faculty or staff members in the Office of Disability Services, or self-identify as an individual with a disability;
- Demonstrate an interest in disability issues.
- Completed a minimum of 24 credits;
- Earned an overall Quality Point Average of 3.10 on a 4.00 scale.
That Wednesday night at the end of April I received my acceptance certificate, a pin and cords to wear at graduation. On my graduation day I will wear those cords with pride!
While this hasn't been something I've been very open about, I'm not ashamed of it either. I'm proud to represent all individuals that have a disability and show that we can still do things.
We are not helpless and we are not stupid.
We just take a little longer and have to work a little harder.
If you'd like to learn more about Delta Alpha Pi, feel free to visit this website:
http://deltaalphapihonorsociety.org/
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