Social media is a large part of most people's lives. Whether it's Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, Twitter, there's at least one of these you've chosen to participate in, if not all of them. And we check them often. What are other people up to? Oh look, there's photos from Point-to-Point yesterday. You document your whole trip to Baltimore and back in multiple 10 second clips.
It's great. It's convenient. It's so easy to do. And with smartphones, it's always at your fingertips.
But is it really as great as we think? Does it cause more problems in our lives than we're aware of?
Think about it.
How many filters did you scroll through so that you look your best?
How many selfies did you have to take before you got that one that was finally acceptable to share?
How many times do you check your posts to see how many likes you have?
What's the latest and greatest gossip going on in other people's lives?
We constantly share, but it's always filtered in some way.
Can't share this photo, I look like I have a double chin.
Can't state what I'm really thinking or feeling because it'll upset someone.
I don't want to change or update this because I don't feel like dealing with all the attention that will come from it.
We've become so insecure about who we really are and I think that's because social media has created this standard that if you post something, you better be ready for the opinion that's coming your way, whether it's a positive or negative one.
We've become so scared of the negative that we strive to always show the best instead of showing the truth.
There is so much power that's held over our heads because we rely so much on the reaction we get from others. The smallest of things can stir emotions.
Did you see so-and-so's relationship status changed?
- Take a step back and think about what those two people might be feeling depending on how that relationship status changed
He/She didn't like my picture so they must not find me pretty.
- If you don't feel pretty, you can't expect others to feel that way about you
Maybe if I un-tag myself from everything or delete a post it'll act like it never happened.
- We all saw it. It still happened. Once it's out there in the cyberworld, it's out there, no matter how much you try and erase it
I can't believe so-and-so supports xyz. I could never support something like that.
- You don't know everyone's story, so try learning more before jumping to conclusions. Agree to disagree.
Judgement is cast so easily today and more times than not, it's negative not positive.
Why can't we support one another? You don't have to agree with everyone and all of their opinions but that doesn't mean you have to bash them either. That's the joy of being different. You don't have to be the same as everyone else and that's okay.
Learn to love yourself and not care about the filter or if it's your best angle. You don't need to try and fit the stereotypes that have been put out there. Show what you really look like. They'll see the truth when they see you in person anyway.
Also, don't have your life revolve around what's going on in others lives. Unless that person is closely related to you or it affects you directly, there is no reason for it. It's one thing to care about people and what they are experiencing, it's another to insert yourself into their situation.
So, the next time you go to post or share on social media, take a step back and look at the situation. Are you positively contributing or no? Are you posting for you or for others?
I've been absent from social media for almost a month and for me that was the positive thing to do because of the negative I could face which is something that I didn't need. Not because I'd done anything wrong but because I didn't need the opinions and interference of everyone else.
Put yourself in the other persons shoes. Remember you are enough and that you don't need the acceptance of others to determine that. Celebrate in the joys of others and comfort those who are struggling. The world around you will also continue to revolve if you don't check all of social media every second of every day.
Monday, May 8, 2017
Saturday, February 11, 2017
Wedding Dress Shopping
I stumbled across an article yesterday that normally I wouldn't read. But this one caught my eye. Probably because it had to do with an activity I've actually been doing lately...wedding dress shopping. The article was called "12 Things Nobody Tells You About Wedding Dress Shopping". A large part of me wanted to see how applicable it was to my own experience. So here's my comparison.
1. Wedding dress shopping is exhausting
I've only been wedding dress shopping twice. Once in November and once just a few weekends ago. The first time I went trying on wedding dresses, I didn't feel it was exhausting at all. It was on a Friday night so I'd finished an 8 hr day of working. I probably tried on about 10 dresses too. Maybe because it was the first time, the excitement of it all outweighed the process but I really did enjoy myself. Now my second trip...oh that was a different experience. I was tired by the end. The dresses felt heavier than I remembered from the first shopping trip. Was that possible? This trip was in the morning so I thought I would have been refreshed from a nights sleep but after more than a dozen dresses I was ready for a nap. I guess my recommendation would be to only visit one store in a day. Any more than that and it becomes too much.
2. Not every wedding dress boutique is going to shower you with champagne
100% true. Now neither of the boutiques I visited had champagne. I was okay with that. I wasn't there for a drink, I was there for a dress. I think what I'd like to share most on this topic is that not every boutique is going to give you the attention you feel you deserve. My first trip, I had a single person who was there to help me into each dress, pull dresses for me to try on, etc. My second boutique trip I had someone but they only pulled the dress for me. My mom ended up helping me into each dress and we were really the ones left to do everything. I was surprised as I'd heard nothing but good reviews regarding the customer service at the 2nd boutique but it certainly wasn't something I experienced there. Do your research to make sure you're going to get what you want out of the experience at the boutique.
3. The wedding dress you end up getting will probably looking NOTHING like the one you've always dreamed about
This one blew me away. I really didn't think this could be true but it 100% was. I had an image in mind before I started shopping of what I thought my dress would look like. What I've ended up choosing does have a few features from what I had in mind but it also has a few that were complete opposites of what I expected. Be open minded.
4. Which is why you should be open to trying on any and all dresses
Yes. Try it all on. My salesperson had brought me a dress and she even said "don't judge it until you try it on". This is their job. They see people try on dresses all day every day. They know what looks good on certain body types. It's important to remember that you still have the final say. I was lucky enough that my sales person was spot on. The dress I've chosen is the one she picked out for me. If she hadn't brought that dress for me to try, I probably never would have found it.
5. Don't buy a wedding dress you have to talk yourself into
I feel lucky that I found my dress and I found it pretty quick. I think of all the dresses I tried on before and after the one that really caught my eye. They were all nice dresses but they weren't MY dress. Don't settle. Find the one you really want.
6. Also don't buy a dress that makes you self-conscious
Buy a dress that makes you feel beautiful. I felt so comfortable in the dress that I chose. It showed off my features and curves well. I knew I felt beautiful in it the moment I walked out of the dressing room and saw myself in the mirror. The expression that came across my face made that clear. I also wasn't wearing crazy spanx or anything like that when I tried it on. I felt that was a good sign.
7. You should feel beautiful in your dress at all angles
Take photos from every angle, if the store allows it. Something might look great from the front and awful from the back. You want something that looks good from anywhere.
8. You don't have to buy all your accessories at once
I haven't even started looking at accessories yet. I knew that once I had my dress I could look anywhere for accessories to go with it. I also know that depending on the type of veil I want, my mom can likely make it versus buying it.
9. The less people you take with you, the better
This is a tough topic. I took a group with me my first shopping trip and I was 100% okay with that. I had a total of 7 people with me. Most people think that's a lot. It was important to me though to include certain people in the experience. It's a once in a lifetime experience. Now my 2nd shopping trip, I only took my mom and my maid of honor. I wasn't into doing a whole ordeal of a shopping trip. I wanted it low key and it was. I'm also glad I didn't have as many people the second time since the shop wasn't as impressive and welcoming.
10. Your opinion is the only one that matters
The more people you take, the more opinions. Luckily I didn't have to worry about that even with taking 7 people. Everyone listened to what I had to say and didn't butt in with their opinions first.
11. You might not find "the one" until you've almost given up
I can't speak from experience on this one. Remember to be patient.
12. You'll know it when you find it...but there doesn't have to be tears!
It was written all over my face when I found "the one". I didn't cry though. My maid of honor may have but I didn't. It didn't mean that I wasn't in love with my dress though. Everyone is different. As long as you know it's the dress for you and you're excited about it, that's all that matters.
Less than 8 months and I'll be able to share the dress I've chosen!!! It'll be here before I know it :) Happy Saturday everyone!
1. Wedding dress shopping is exhausting
I've only been wedding dress shopping twice. Once in November and once just a few weekends ago. The first time I went trying on wedding dresses, I didn't feel it was exhausting at all. It was on a Friday night so I'd finished an 8 hr day of working. I probably tried on about 10 dresses too. Maybe because it was the first time, the excitement of it all outweighed the process but I really did enjoy myself. Now my second trip...oh that was a different experience. I was tired by the end. The dresses felt heavier than I remembered from the first shopping trip. Was that possible? This trip was in the morning so I thought I would have been refreshed from a nights sleep but after more than a dozen dresses I was ready for a nap. I guess my recommendation would be to only visit one store in a day. Any more than that and it becomes too much.
2. Not every wedding dress boutique is going to shower you with champagne
100% true. Now neither of the boutiques I visited had champagne. I was okay with that. I wasn't there for a drink, I was there for a dress. I think what I'd like to share most on this topic is that not every boutique is going to give you the attention you feel you deserve. My first trip, I had a single person who was there to help me into each dress, pull dresses for me to try on, etc. My second boutique trip I had someone but they only pulled the dress for me. My mom ended up helping me into each dress and we were really the ones left to do everything. I was surprised as I'd heard nothing but good reviews regarding the customer service at the 2nd boutique but it certainly wasn't something I experienced there. Do your research to make sure you're going to get what you want out of the experience at the boutique.
3. The wedding dress you end up getting will probably looking NOTHING like the one you've always dreamed about
This one blew me away. I really didn't think this could be true but it 100% was. I had an image in mind before I started shopping of what I thought my dress would look like. What I've ended up choosing does have a few features from what I had in mind but it also has a few that were complete opposites of what I expected. Be open minded.
4. Which is why you should be open to trying on any and all dresses
Yes. Try it all on. My salesperson had brought me a dress and she even said "don't judge it until you try it on". This is their job. They see people try on dresses all day every day. They know what looks good on certain body types. It's important to remember that you still have the final say. I was lucky enough that my sales person was spot on. The dress I've chosen is the one she picked out for me. If she hadn't brought that dress for me to try, I probably never would have found it.
5. Don't buy a wedding dress you have to talk yourself into
I feel lucky that I found my dress and I found it pretty quick. I think of all the dresses I tried on before and after the one that really caught my eye. They were all nice dresses but they weren't MY dress. Don't settle. Find the one you really want.
6. Also don't buy a dress that makes you self-conscious
Buy a dress that makes you feel beautiful. I felt so comfortable in the dress that I chose. It showed off my features and curves well. I knew I felt beautiful in it the moment I walked out of the dressing room and saw myself in the mirror. The expression that came across my face made that clear. I also wasn't wearing crazy spanx or anything like that when I tried it on. I felt that was a good sign.
7. You should feel beautiful in your dress at all angles
Take photos from every angle, if the store allows it. Something might look great from the front and awful from the back. You want something that looks good from anywhere.
8. You don't have to buy all your accessories at once
I haven't even started looking at accessories yet. I knew that once I had my dress I could look anywhere for accessories to go with it. I also know that depending on the type of veil I want, my mom can likely make it versus buying it.
9. The less people you take with you, the better
This is a tough topic. I took a group with me my first shopping trip and I was 100% okay with that. I had a total of 7 people with me. Most people think that's a lot. It was important to me though to include certain people in the experience. It's a once in a lifetime experience. Now my 2nd shopping trip, I only took my mom and my maid of honor. I wasn't into doing a whole ordeal of a shopping trip. I wanted it low key and it was. I'm also glad I didn't have as many people the second time since the shop wasn't as impressive and welcoming.
10. Your opinion is the only one that matters
The more people you take, the more opinions. Luckily I didn't have to worry about that even with taking 7 people. Everyone listened to what I had to say and didn't butt in with their opinions first.
11. You might not find "the one" until you've almost given up
I can't speak from experience on this one. Remember to be patient.
12. You'll know it when you find it...but there doesn't have to be tears!
It was written all over my face when I found "the one". I didn't cry though. My maid of honor may have but I didn't. It didn't mean that I wasn't in love with my dress though. Everyone is different. As long as you know it's the dress for you and you're excited about it, that's all that matters.
Less than 8 months and I'll be able to share the dress I've chosen!!! It'll be here before I know it :) Happy Saturday everyone!
Monday, January 16, 2017
Kids vs Adults - Holidays
How is it already half way through January?
Time is going by so quickly and I know that's only going to get worse the farther into this year we get. This year is going to be filled with so much good. I become a MRS. this year and I think that's what I'm looking forward to most. I've just started feeling the slight stress that comes with planning a wedding but mainly I'm just excited.
With things going by so quickly, I often find myself saying "I need a break!" A day to catch up on the little things. I'm one of those people that feels guilty taking time off of work though so I never do. Even when I'm sick it's a struggle to make that call saying I can't make it in. And with today being MLK holiday, it brings me to this post's topic...Adults should have off all the same holidays that kids in school get off.
Today is considered a holiday and schools are closed. I'm still sitting at work though. Why do the kids need to have the day off if the adults don't?
I get that kids are exerting themselves in schools (or at least they're supposed to be). Learning isn't always an easy thing. I think mental activity can be just as draining as a physical activity at times. These kids get these breaks almost every month. A day off here, a day off there. I think adults should be having those same days off. Not because they asked for that day off but because it's just the standard to be off.
Now don't get me wrong, I'm not asking for the 2.5 months off that kids get during the summer. That's unreasonable. Businesses couldn't succeed if everyone was off for 2.5 months. But what's wrong with adding MLK, President's Day, Veteran's Day, etc. to our list off days off?
Work can be just as draining as school. I would think employers would be more likely to add these other holidays to the list because it would allow their employees time to be refreshed. I know I personally feel more ready and willing to work after an extended weekend. It probably shows in the work I accomplish too.
By giving employees off on these holidays it would also allow families more time to spend together. The kids are off and the parents are either left having to take off work to stay home with the kids or the kids go to daycare. If parents automatically had off, they could happily spend time with their kids. They wouldn't have to feel guilty taking time off work or for spending the money for daycare.
So, who is with me? Who else wants off on these holidays? I know I could have definitely used the break today.
Time is going by so quickly and I know that's only going to get worse the farther into this year we get. This year is going to be filled with so much good. I become a MRS. this year and I think that's what I'm looking forward to most. I've just started feeling the slight stress that comes with planning a wedding but mainly I'm just excited.
With things going by so quickly, I often find myself saying "I need a break!" A day to catch up on the little things. I'm one of those people that feels guilty taking time off of work though so I never do. Even when I'm sick it's a struggle to make that call saying I can't make it in. And with today being MLK holiday, it brings me to this post's topic...Adults should have off all the same holidays that kids in school get off.
Today is considered a holiday and schools are closed. I'm still sitting at work though. Why do the kids need to have the day off if the adults don't?
I get that kids are exerting themselves in schools (or at least they're supposed to be). Learning isn't always an easy thing. I think mental activity can be just as draining as a physical activity at times. These kids get these breaks almost every month. A day off here, a day off there. I think adults should be having those same days off. Not because they asked for that day off but because it's just the standard to be off.
Now don't get me wrong, I'm not asking for the 2.5 months off that kids get during the summer. That's unreasonable. Businesses couldn't succeed if everyone was off for 2.5 months. But what's wrong with adding MLK, President's Day, Veteran's Day, etc. to our list off days off?
Work can be just as draining as school. I would think employers would be more likely to add these other holidays to the list because it would allow their employees time to be refreshed. I know I personally feel more ready and willing to work after an extended weekend. It probably shows in the work I accomplish too.
By giving employees off on these holidays it would also allow families more time to spend together. The kids are off and the parents are either left having to take off work to stay home with the kids or the kids go to daycare. If parents automatically had off, they could happily spend time with their kids. They wouldn't have to feel guilty taking time off work or for spending the money for daycare.
So, who is with me? Who else wants off on these holidays? I know I could have definitely used the break today.
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